Somewhere tonight, there is a women missing her soldier. She misses his laugh, his smile, is energy, is voice. She misses his silence, his presence, his heater like ability in the middle of the night. She is missing his things on the floor, his dishes in the sink. Snoring at night and the blaring alarm at the crack of dawn. She misses her backseat driver, and the couch cuddling. Cooking big meals and washing his uniforms.
She knows that he is working. She is aware that this is the life they chose. Even knowing that the time apart is not forever, nor even very long.... it feels that way. It feels like he has been gone forever and has forever to go before he comes back.
She is aware that this time apart is nothing compared to what some people go through, or what she may go through with him in the future.
She reminds herself why she does what she does. No matter where her soldier may be, there are still kids here to feed, dress, bathe, and play with. She knows there are still bills that still need paying, and a house that still needs dusting. She knows why he does what he does, and why she does what she does.
With everyday that goes by she knows she is becoming a stronger person. At the end of everyday she looks back on all that she has done and smiles. When she sleeps she dreams only of his face and his voice. She replays his coming home over and over in her head. The things that they will talk about and the things they will do. For this particular wife, she will be proud of all the things she has done and all the changes in the last month.
None of these things make missing him any easier. It just gives her the ability to talk to her way through it. Even if she is talking to herself.
To my soldier and the millions of others that are scattered all around the world, no matter how long you have been gone, or will be gone, know that you are thought about all the time. You are missed every minute of everyday. You are respected, and make your families proud. You are a hero & We are still here being the rock we promised to be.
I love you PFC David Johnson.. I miss you all the time, and I can not wait till you make it home and we can start a whole new way of life. In a new home!! in a new place!!!
Friday, July 16, 2010
Wednesday, July 7, 2010
Short Seperation
In the world of the army wives there are times when you are all alone. Times when he is called to work or train somewhere else. This is happening to us right now. Dave is away training for the whole month and the rest is up to me. Kids 24/7, all the housework, all the cooking, all the appointments etc. I know that he will be home before I know it. I know that there are plenty here that are going without their loved ones for 12 months or more. I think about how lucky we are, to be able to do something like this short trail before he just up and leaves for year.
I have decided that I do miss him even though he has been gone only a few days. He is my husband and even if he is gone to work for the day I miss him. It's just part of the job. I am sure that some out there are very depressed and just counting days till they get home. I am counting, but only in my head. I am mentally prepared for him having to stay a little longer than we thought, as that is what the army does best.
I have made up my mind and make this whole "being apart" period to challenge myself. I have been taking the kids out all by myself. I am just proving to myself that I am stronger than I think. I am working with the kids the best that I can to get them to do things, like loose the nook and to use the potty. Can you imagine what a great feeling that would be to get all that done in the month that he is gone. There is not much that I have done in my life that is rewarding, besides the kids. Dave decided when Dallas was born that I was going to stay home and that is how it has been since.
This is really something I can make myself proud over and prove that I can do it. Not just for me, but also for the kids. The kids can make a person crazy, I am not going to lie. The way that I have decided to channel that energy and frustration is to put it all into playing with them, taking them out when I can, AND workout at the end of the day.
This may seem silly to most as I know that he is not going to be gone that long. He was gone for longer when he was in basic and AIT. I had family than though. It was nothing like it is now. Yes, I have great friends here and they help when they can, but I would rather do it on my own. They have families that they are tending to as well. This is all me.
Since we moved here we have been doing everything as a family. It has been a great feeling. Buying everything that have got here and the big electronics, we did that all on our own. When we were back home sometimes we had to borrow money from family to get us through the week. It's not that we make more now, we just know how to manage it better. It is really a great feeling to not have to depend on others and to know that you can do it on your own. SO that is what I am going to do, all while missing him.
My soldier is my hero and I am his rock. Together we are a team and together we can do anything. He is always in my heart no matter how far away he is. We are a team and we are one. I love you PFC Johnson and I can not wait till you come home again!!!!
I have decided that I do miss him even though he has been gone only a few days. He is my husband and even if he is gone to work for the day I miss him. It's just part of the job. I am sure that some out there are very depressed and just counting days till they get home. I am counting, but only in my head. I am mentally prepared for him having to stay a little longer than we thought, as that is what the army does best.
I have made up my mind and make this whole "being apart" period to challenge myself. I have been taking the kids out all by myself. I am just proving to myself that I am stronger than I think. I am working with the kids the best that I can to get them to do things, like loose the nook and to use the potty. Can you imagine what a great feeling that would be to get all that done in the month that he is gone. There is not much that I have done in my life that is rewarding, besides the kids. Dave decided when Dallas was born that I was going to stay home and that is how it has been since.
This is really something I can make myself proud over and prove that I can do it. Not just for me, but also for the kids. The kids can make a person crazy, I am not going to lie. The way that I have decided to channel that energy and frustration is to put it all into playing with them, taking them out when I can, AND workout at the end of the day.
This may seem silly to most as I know that he is not going to be gone that long. He was gone for longer when he was in basic and AIT. I had family than though. It was nothing like it is now. Yes, I have great friends here and they help when they can, but I would rather do it on my own. They have families that they are tending to as well. This is all me.
Since we moved here we have been doing everything as a family. It has been a great feeling. Buying everything that have got here and the big electronics, we did that all on our own. When we were back home sometimes we had to borrow money from family to get us through the week. It's not that we make more now, we just know how to manage it better. It is really a great feeling to not have to depend on others and to know that you can do it on your own. SO that is what I am going to do, all while missing him.
My soldier is my hero and I am his rock. Together we are a team and together we can do anything. He is always in my heart no matter how far away he is. We are a team and we are one. I love you PFC Johnson and I can not wait till you come home again!!!!
Tuesday, May 25, 2010
To Dallas~
Dearest Child~
Three years ago tomorrow, I was handed my very first miracle. Something so small and amazing, I didn't ever think would be mine. Weighing 5 pounds and 12 ounces, so very very small. So innocent, loving, and dependent. Dependent not on the world, but on me. Through the year you have become more more dependent. Sometimes it makes me sad and sometimes it makes me happy. It makes me sad to know that not that long ago you needed me so much , and now you can do things on your own. Makes me realize that as more years pass your going to need me less and less. It makes me happy just to see you grow. To see you be more independent because I know that those things are going to make a very smart, happy young man.
You love movies and memorizing them the best that you can. You like to fish, and go to the park. Playing with friends and going out to BBQ. You are such a happy little boy, and it makes me shine from the inside out. You give mommy all the hugs and kisses she could ever ask for. You give them to me whenever I ask. It makes me so happy to know that I can make you happy.
Some of the things that I can not ever forget about you at this age is:
Sitting by me and asking me whats up mom.
waking up in the morning and telling me morning mom.
Bedtime and telling me you love me and good night.
That you still love your own bed and don't like to sleep anywhere but your own house and your own bed alone.
You tell me that baby brother is "so Cute"
Tell me that your going to kick my butt.
Wrestling with your daddy.
Counting with you.
You pointing out things to me and asking me what they are and then telling me thats right mommy.
I am so happy to call you mine, and so you make me so proud all the time. I am not going to lie, we have our moments. My heart breaks when I have to disipline you and you cry. You and I are so close, and it breaks my heart. I know that someday your really not going to want to hang out with your mom all the time. SO i know that I am going to enjoy this time all that I can and cherish these memories.
Dallas you started your life as my first special miracle, and you have continued to be that not just for me, but for the rest of our family and the people around you.
I love you sweetheart. You a very special spark in my life, and I hope that you never loose that in you. We are always here for you and love so with all our hearts. No matter where you go in life never forget that!
Thank you son for being such a MIRACLE!!!
Three years ago tomorrow, I was handed my very first miracle. Something so small and amazing, I didn't ever think would be mine. Weighing 5 pounds and 12 ounces, so very very small. So innocent, loving, and dependent. Dependent not on the world, but on me. Through the year you have become more more dependent. Sometimes it makes me sad and sometimes it makes me happy. It makes me sad to know that not that long ago you needed me so much , and now you can do things on your own. Makes me realize that as more years pass your going to need me less and less. It makes me happy just to see you grow. To see you be more independent because I know that those things are going to make a very smart, happy young man.
You love movies and memorizing them the best that you can. You like to fish, and go to the park. Playing with friends and going out to BBQ. You are such a happy little boy, and it makes me shine from the inside out. You give mommy all the hugs and kisses she could ever ask for. You give them to me whenever I ask. It makes me so happy to know that I can make you happy.
Some of the things that I can not ever forget about you at this age is:
Sitting by me and asking me whats up mom.
waking up in the morning and telling me morning mom.
Bedtime and telling me you love me and good night.
That you still love your own bed and don't like to sleep anywhere but your own house and your own bed alone.
You tell me that baby brother is "so Cute"
Tell me that your going to kick my butt.
Wrestling with your daddy.
Counting with you.
You pointing out things to me and asking me what they are and then telling me thats right mommy.
I am so happy to call you mine, and so you make me so proud all the time. I am not going to lie, we have our moments. My heart breaks when I have to disipline you and you cry. You and I are so close, and it breaks my heart. I know that someday your really not going to want to hang out with your mom all the time. SO i know that I am going to enjoy this time all that I can and cherish these memories.
Dallas you started your life as my first special miracle, and you have continued to be that not just for me, but for the rest of our family and the people around you.
I love you sweetheart. You a very special spark in my life, and I hope that you never loose that in you. We are always here for you and love so with all our hearts. No matter where you go in life never forget that!
Thank you son for being such a MIRACLE!!!
Tuesday, May 11, 2010
My Grandma
Lucille Delores Dorscher
Grandma, you were such an amazing person since I can remember. You have always been there for me and have always helped me no matter what I needed. I have learned so much from you, and have so many memories. Some of my earliest memories start with camping trips in the pop up camper.
Packing lunches to go fishing on the boat.
You and I watching the birds outside. You would teach me what the birds where. Even if it was a little boring at the time I cherish the time now.
Showing me around the garden and introducing me to fresh peas and carrots. Nothing can compare to those!
Watching the Jungle Book over and over no matter how much you would have watched anything else at that point.
Sitting in your truck, I thought it was the coolest thing in the world.
You and Grandpa letting me sit in the boat in the yard and letting me cast.
Saturday nights at your house so I could go to church with you in the morning.
Letting the dog in my room to lick my face to wake me every Sunday.
Chocolate Malt-o-meal, toast and O.J. every Sunday morning before church, than church. than you me and grandpa going out to eat. (Chocolate smily faced pancakes at Village inn with extra whipped Cream)
Shopping EVERY Sunday after lunch at Herbergers'
Singing and recording us singing a million songs, than listening to them back and laughing.
You and Grandpa trying to teach me say loon, and i smashed my face off the table.
Giving me your nylons to "skate" on the kitchen floor. After i fell i never asked again.
Hiding in your closet for about a half hour before we realized that no one was going to come looking for us.
Your closet and the million pairs of high heels lined up all over the whole closet.
Playing returant in the basement at the unused bar.
The day everything changed, you came out of the shower to take me summer shopping and nothing was ever the same after that shower. I remember having to watch grandpa try to get you into the van to the hospital. Sitting in the waiting room. Un aware of what was going on.
After all of that you were in the nursing home and paralized on your left side. Everything chaged so much in the 11 years that you were there. Grandpa got sick and passed, all the weddings and great grandkids. I wish you were there for it all. I never blamed you for not being able to be. You have gone through so much in the last 11 years. You became the longest resident at St Micheals Nursing Home. You made amazing friends there and great people that loved you so much they became more like family to all of us.
Being able to come home to say good bye to you ment so much to me. Even though it was so hard to see you in such rough shape those first few days that you were talking were so great. I loved to hear you say you loved me and for me to be able to tell you how much I loved you.
After you passed I I think I was relived as you were in so so so much pain and so ready to see grandpa again. I had a hard hard time but I know that I had to say something at your viewing and so I did, and i am glad that I did. I have no regrets at all. At your funeral along with a rose we grand kids were asked to offer something that reminded us of you and i offered yarn, you crochets so many amazing things and helped to show me how. I think that I might try to learn how again.
Grandma~ You were an amazing, strong, funny, hard working person. You were so great to me and always there for me. And like always you will always be in my heart and my thoughts. All those memories are always going to be with me. I will share them with my kids as time goes on and I will visit you every chance I can. Someday I will see you again, and it will be amazing.
Thank you for everything, never forget that I love you and tell grandpa I miss him so much! I hope that you both have found each other and you are Polka dancing up there :)
Love always and forever,
Whitney Jean
Grandma, you were such an amazing person since I can remember. You have always been there for me and have always helped me no matter what I needed. I have learned so much from you, and have so many memories. Some of my earliest memories start with camping trips in the pop up camper.
Packing lunches to go fishing on the boat.
You and I watching the birds outside. You would teach me what the birds where. Even if it was a little boring at the time I cherish the time now.
Showing me around the garden and introducing me to fresh peas and carrots. Nothing can compare to those!
Watching the Jungle Book over and over no matter how much you would have watched anything else at that point.
Sitting in your truck, I thought it was the coolest thing in the world.
You and Grandpa letting me sit in the boat in the yard and letting me cast.
Saturday nights at your house so I could go to church with you in the morning.
Letting the dog in my room to lick my face to wake me every Sunday.
Chocolate Malt-o-meal, toast and O.J. every Sunday morning before church, than church. than you me and grandpa going out to eat. (Chocolate smily faced pancakes at Village inn with extra whipped Cream)
Shopping EVERY Sunday after lunch at Herbergers'
Singing and recording us singing a million songs, than listening to them back and laughing.
You and Grandpa trying to teach me say loon, and i smashed my face off the table.
Giving me your nylons to "skate" on the kitchen floor. After i fell i never asked again.
Hiding in your closet for about a half hour before we realized that no one was going to come looking for us.
Your closet and the million pairs of high heels lined up all over the whole closet.
Playing returant in the basement at the unused bar.
The day everything changed, you came out of the shower to take me summer shopping and nothing was ever the same after that shower. I remember having to watch grandpa try to get you into the van to the hospital. Sitting in the waiting room. Un aware of what was going on.
After all of that you were in the nursing home and paralized on your left side. Everything chaged so much in the 11 years that you were there. Grandpa got sick and passed, all the weddings and great grandkids. I wish you were there for it all. I never blamed you for not being able to be. You have gone through so much in the last 11 years. You became the longest resident at St Micheals Nursing Home. You made amazing friends there and great people that loved you so much they became more like family to all of us.
Being able to come home to say good bye to you ment so much to me. Even though it was so hard to see you in such rough shape those first few days that you were talking were so great. I loved to hear you say you loved me and for me to be able to tell you how much I loved you.
After you passed I I think I was relived as you were in so so so much pain and so ready to see grandpa again. I had a hard hard time but I know that I had to say something at your viewing and so I did, and i am glad that I did. I have no regrets at all. At your funeral along with a rose we grand kids were asked to offer something that reminded us of you and i offered yarn, you crochets so many amazing things and helped to show me how. I think that I might try to learn how again.
Grandma~ You were an amazing, strong, funny, hard working person. You were so great to me and always there for me. And like always you will always be in my heart and my thoughts. All those memories are always going to be with me. I will share them with my kids as time goes on and I will visit you every chance I can. Someday I will see you again, and it will be amazing.
Thank you for everything, never forget that I love you and tell grandpa I miss him so much! I hope that you both have found each other and you are Polka dancing up there :)
Love always and forever,
Whitney Jean
Tuesday, April 20, 2010
Thank a Millitary Spouse in 101 Ways
This is not mine. It is something that i liked so I had to have it on here. LOVE IT!!!!
1. A simple "Thank You for Serving, too"
2. CHOCOLATE
3. Take the time to *listen* She may not have had an adult conversation for quite some time!
4. Don’t assume HE is not a military spouse. Thank the military-husbands too.
5. Pick up something at the store that reminds you of her; a potted-plant, a bouquet of flowers, a bottle of wine, nail-polish & nail files, etc etc
6. Give her a call! Say ‘Thank You’ and find out how her day is going.
7. A day at the spa! (Thank you, @shelly_76)
8. FREE child-care. Watch her children for her. Let her do something on her own.
9. Invite her out for a local-sight-seeing tour. She might not know the area & enjoy learning.
10. Equip her.
11. Take a spouse out for coffee or tea.
12. Pray for him. Pray for her.
13. Make a fancy-drink. Pour two glasses. One for you, one for her. Make toasts and enjoy together.
14. *Give* him a book from your book-shelf that you enjoyed.
15. Offer to wash her car (Don’t forget to vacuum)
16. Business-owners: Host a special event just for spouses, don’t do it for monetary gain.
17. Do you garden? Bring her some of your produce; flowers, fruits, vegetables.
18. Give her personal space to miss her loved one. Then open-up your arms to take her in.
19. Gather your mutual-friends. Have a multi-family picnic.
20. If she calls asking for something, a cup of milk, some eggs, potatoes etc etc Lend with a cheerful heart and don't expect your 'gift' back!
21. Buy her a military-spouse shirt. Have it shipped to her: http://shop.cafepress.com/military-spouse
22. Find a military-spouse book she might enjoy: http://tinyurl.com/csm6wb
23. Plan a play-date at your house. Get the kids together and enjoy the day.
24. Sit with him at church. Not many enjoy sitting in the pew alone.
25. Take a picture. Send it in an email to her.
26. Offer to help with yard-work! (Thanks, @guamgurl)
27. Give her privacy if you sense she does not want to open up.
28. Send her a quick note (on hand-made stationary if you are feeling crafty).
29. Say Thank You with food. Its the way to our heart!
30. Send her an email, let her know you miss her if you haven't seen each other in awhile.
31. If you haven't seen her for some time because of distance look at the calendar. When can you visit? Don't always expect her to do the travelling home.
32. Get excited over something he is excited about!
33. Take her children to the park. Ask if she WANTS to come to. Some spouses like time alone; others want adult-company. It might just depend on her mood.
34. Give him a genuine smile; remember, a smile is worth a thousand words!
35. Compliment her children
36. Send an anonymous note of encouragement
37. Do you have a favorite magazine? Send her a subscription
38. Call her up. Ask if she wants to go out and get some ice-cream!
39. Run across a funny comic-strip or joke that reminded you of him? Clip it and send in a letter.
40. Do you see a new face in the crowd? She might be a new-spouse. Go over and introduce yourself.
41. If a seasoned-spouse does something that makes you feel welcomed, say Thank You. It'll make her feel good, too.
42. Business Owners: Offer a Military-Discount (List it on MilitaryAvenue.com)
43. Don't assume she knows that you appreciate her sacrifice as a military-spouse. Say it.
44. Organizations: Host a special military-spouse tea. It doesn't have to be 'fussy', just fun!
45. If you are standing in line at the commissary and she is behind you with a cart full of food, fussy babies & screaming toddlers let her go in front of you. *Everyone* may say Thank You.
46. Say good-things about her spouse, the service-member. It can feel like a reflection of her.
47. Are you the service-member? Wash your spouse's feet. What a humbling, gratifying act for the woman (or man!) you love so much. (TY, @milave_dan)
48. Give her a list of things she has done for you. Take 5 minutes and make a list of 10 to 50 things you love about her.
49. Appreciate that "How are you holding up" isn't always the best question to ask the spouse of a deployed service member! (Thank You, @jen004)
50. Make her a CD full of all the songs that remind you of her. Keep it cheery!
51. Don't forget the Military Husband! Include him while planning spouse-functions (Thank You, @SaintJer)
52. Pick up a bottle of bubble bath. Deliver it with a small note of appreciation.
53. Respect her decisions. If she says she can't do it let her 'no be no'.
54. Give to Operation Showers of Appreciation for 'expecting' moms with deployed spouses: http://www.operationshowersofappreciation.org/ (Thank you, @CMWTR)
55. Offer a simple-hug. Amazing what 'touch' can do to heal the soul. But respect personal space if that is an issue. (Thank You, @texasangel88)
56. Go to an art-class together. Many bases have an Art-Shop, or find a local business where you can make jewelry or paint-ceramics together.
57. Take him out to a ball game; either a local pro- or semi-pro. Buy him a beer and a hot dog. And enjoy the evening!
58. Are her kids sick? Is SHE sick? Offer to help. Bring over chicken-noodle soup. Run to the store for some 7-Up. Find out what she needs.
59. Service-members: Help her with the laundry! Help put it away without being asked.
60. Did she make a dish for a social-gathering? Compliment her. Ask for the recipe! Tell someone that is near you how good it is.
61. Contact your local Television or Radio Station. Do *they* know it is Military Spouse Appreciation Day?
62. Don't forget to say 'Please' if you need her. She is probably juggling quite a bit at once. She will appreciate being asked, as opposed to told.
63. Chamber of Commerce: Host a special city-wide event for your military families. (Place your event on MilitaryAvenue.com at your closest installations to get the word out.)
64. Take the time to find out how his weekend was. Where the family went, what they did, how his son's baseball game was.
65. Show her politeness, thoughtfulness and helpfulness. Open the door for her, pick up something she dropped.
66. Service-member: Buy "a little something" for the bedroom that you know s/he'll enjoy. ;)
67. Help her start a hobby. As an example, if you scrapbook offer to help her get started if she is interested.
68. Businesses: Hold a contest that will benefit the military spouse like, "Laptops for Flattops" (http://tinyurl.com/dkv6ob)
69. Service-member: Whisper sweet-nothings in your spouse's ear. Tell him how much you appreciate him.
70. Help her children make an "I Love You, Mom" card. Get artsy with glitter and glue and construction paper.
71. Make some cookies with your kids & have them deliver them. Teach your own children gratitude for our military-families. She will appreciate it.
72. Do you make cards? Send blank ones to @cardsforheroes. They send them to deployed soldiers to can send a note home on - a treasure for a military spouse!
73. A very simple, heartfelt thank you means the world. Oh, and donuts too. (Thank You, @redsoxfan529)
74. Businesses: Contact your installations Family Service Center and find out what you can do for the families on base. (http://militarymarketing.militaryavenue.com/2009/05/how-to-get-involved-in-your-military.html)
75. Invite him over for a game on TV. Sit back and enjoy a beer together.
76. When cooking dinner, make enough for two families. Bring half to a military-family or invite their family over.
77. Benefit Of The Doubt. A little BOTD can go a long way to show your appreciation for the military-spouse.
78. Make an acrostic with his/her name filled with adjectives about their strengths. (TY, @MilAve_Deborah)
79. Flexibility is the name of game. Be flexible in making plans. Things happen out of her control.
80. When thanking a soldier for their service, thank their spouse, too! (TY, @Kdpartak)
81. Play a game of catch with her children. They may be missing the presence of a man in their life.
82. Businesses: Have a special gift for all the military spouses that come through your door; a key chain, a nail file, keep it simple.
83. Hit a mid-day movie together. Buy a large popcorn to share!
84. Invite her to a bible-study at your church. What a great way to meet new people!
85. Grab the strollers and take a walk together!
86. Servicemen - Buy her favorite lotion and give her a back rub.
87. Businesses - Having a special contest? Ask a military spouse to be a judge. She'll be honored.
88. Call, Send an email, leave a comment to her/him. Sometimes the smallest gesture means much more than you think. (TY, @proudwifey)
89. Service-member: Sign up for dance classes with your spouse.
90. Take time to get to know HER/HIM. He/she is more than a #milspouse (TY, @tiffsilverberg)
91. Do you have a friend you know she would enjoy knowing? Introduce them!
92. Do they have a green-thumb? Give a potted plant. "Bloom where you are planted" and a note that says thanks
93. Invite him over for a bbq on a Friday night!
94. Businesses: Do you see the flash of her ID when she makes a transaction? Be sure to say Thank you for her service!
95. Military Spouse in the family? Laminate a special card with the families' phone numbers, addresses, birthdays. Help her keep organized.
96. Service-Member: Take Leave on your anniversary. Do something special together. #milspouse (TY,@jen004)
97. Do you have a pool (or just a slip-n-slide!) invite the military-family over. Have a big pitcher of lemonade ready! (TY, @milave_col_k)
98. Plan a girls' day... manicures, pedicures and lunch!
99. Create a Themed box or basket for her. Drop it off at her door anonymously with a note of appreciation. (TY, @milave_deborah)
100. Businesses: Encourage your colleagues to offer a meaningful military-discount. Make yourself a town that appreciates the military!
101. Make her stop, breathe, and ASK "How can I help?" and then do it.
1. A simple "Thank You for Serving, too"
2. CHOCOLATE
3. Take the time to *listen* She may not have had an adult conversation for quite some time!
4. Don’t assume HE is not a military spouse. Thank the military-husbands too.
5. Pick up something at the store that reminds you of her; a potted-plant, a bouquet of flowers, a bottle of wine, nail-polish & nail files, etc etc
6. Give her a call! Say ‘Thank You’ and find out how her day is going.
7. A day at the spa! (Thank you, @shelly_76)
8. FREE child-care. Watch her children for her. Let her do something on her own.
9. Invite her out for a local-sight-seeing tour. She might not know the area & enjoy learning.
10. Equip her.
11. Take a spouse out for coffee or tea.
12. Pray for him. Pray for her.
13. Make a fancy-drink. Pour two glasses. One for you, one for her. Make toasts and enjoy together.
14. *Give* him a book from your book-shelf that you enjoyed.
15. Offer to wash her car (Don’t forget to vacuum)
16. Business-owners: Host a special event just for spouses, don’t do it for monetary gain.
17. Do you garden? Bring her some of your produce; flowers, fruits, vegetables.
18. Give her personal space to miss her loved one. Then open-up your arms to take her in.
19. Gather your mutual-friends. Have a multi-family picnic.
20. If she calls asking for something, a cup of milk, some eggs, potatoes etc etc Lend with a cheerful heart and don't expect your 'gift' back!
21. Buy her a military-spouse shirt. Have it shipped to her: http://shop.cafepress.com/military-spouse
22. Find a military-spouse book she might enjoy: http://tinyurl.com/csm6wb
23. Plan a play-date at your house. Get the kids together and enjoy the day.
24. Sit with him at church. Not many enjoy sitting in the pew alone.
25. Take a picture. Send it in an email to her.
26. Offer to help with yard-work! (Thanks, @guamgurl)
27. Give her privacy if you sense she does not want to open up.
28. Send her a quick note (on hand-made stationary if you are feeling crafty).
29. Say Thank You with food. Its the way to our heart!
30. Send her an email, let her know you miss her if you haven't seen each other in awhile.
31. If you haven't seen her for some time because of distance look at the calendar. When can you visit? Don't always expect her to do the travelling home.
32. Get excited over something he is excited about!
33. Take her children to the park. Ask if she WANTS to come to. Some spouses like time alone; others want adult-company. It might just depend on her mood.
34. Give him a genuine smile; remember, a smile is worth a thousand words!
35. Compliment her children
36. Send an anonymous note of encouragement
37. Do you have a favorite magazine? Send her a subscription
38. Call her up. Ask if she wants to go out and get some ice-cream!
39. Run across a funny comic-strip or joke that reminded you of him? Clip it and send in a letter.
40. Do you see a new face in the crowd? She might be a new-spouse. Go over and introduce yourself.
41. If a seasoned-spouse does something that makes you feel welcomed, say Thank You. It'll make her feel good, too.
42. Business Owners: Offer a Military-Discount (List it on MilitaryAvenue.com)
43. Don't assume she knows that you appreciate her sacrifice as a military-spouse. Say it.
44. Organizations: Host a special military-spouse tea. It doesn't have to be 'fussy', just fun!
45. If you are standing in line at the commissary and she is behind you with a cart full of food, fussy babies & screaming toddlers let her go in front of you. *Everyone* may say Thank You.
46. Say good-things about her spouse, the service-member. It can feel like a reflection of her.
47. Are you the service-member? Wash your spouse's feet. What a humbling, gratifying act for the woman (or man!) you love so much. (TY, @milave_dan)
48. Give her a list of things she has done for you. Take 5 minutes and make a list of 10 to 50 things you love about her.
49. Appreciate that "How are you holding up" isn't always the best question to ask the spouse of a deployed service member! (Thank You, @jen004)
50. Make her a CD full of all the songs that remind you of her. Keep it cheery!
51. Don't forget the Military Husband! Include him while planning spouse-functions (Thank You, @SaintJer)
52. Pick up a bottle of bubble bath. Deliver it with a small note of appreciation.
53. Respect her decisions. If she says she can't do it let her 'no be no'.
54. Give to Operation Showers of Appreciation for 'expecting' moms with deployed spouses: http://www.operationshowersofappreciation.org/ (Thank you, @CMWTR)
55. Offer a simple-hug. Amazing what 'touch' can do to heal the soul. But respect personal space if that is an issue. (Thank You, @texasangel88)
56. Go to an art-class together. Many bases have an Art-Shop, or find a local business where you can make jewelry or paint-ceramics together.
57. Take him out to a ball game; either a local pro- or semi-pro. Buy him a beer and a hot dog. And enjoy the evening!
58. Are her kids sick? Is SHE sick? Offer to help. Bring over chicken-noodle soup. Run to the store for some 7-Up. Find out what she needs.
59. Service-members: Help her with the laundry! Help put it away without being asked.
60. Did she make a dish for a social-gathering? Compliment her. Ask for the recipe! Tell someone that is near you how good it is.
61. Contact your local Television or Radio Station. Do *they* know it is Military Spouse Appreciation Day?
62. Don't forget to say 'Please' if you need her. She is probably juggling quite a bit at once. She will appreciate being asked, as opposed to told.
63. Chamber of Commerce: Host a special city-wide event for your military families. (Place your event on MilitaryAvenue.com at your closest installations to get the word out.)
64. Take the time to find out how his weekend was. Where the family went, what they did, how his son's baseball game was.
65. Show her politeness, thoughtfulness and helpfulness. Open the door for her, pick up something she dropped.
66. Service-member: Buy "a little something" for the bedroom that you know s/he'll enjoy. ;)
67. Help her start a hobby. As an example, if you scrapbook offer to help her get started if she is interested.
68. Businesses: Hold a contest that will benefit the military spouse like, "Laptops for Flattops" (http://tinyurl.com/dkv6ob)
69. Service-member: Whisper sweet-nothings in your spouse's ear. Tell him how much you appreciate him.
70. Help her children make an "I Love You, Mom" card. Get artsy with glitter and glue and construction paper.
71. Make some cookies with your kids & have them deliver them. Teach your own children gratitude for our military-families. She will appreciate it.
72. Do you make cards? Send blank ones to @cardsforheroes. They send them to deployed soldiers to can send a note home on - a treasure for a military spouse!
73. A very simple, heartfelt thank you means the world. Oh, and donuts too. (Thank You, @redsoxfan529)
74. Businesses: Contact your installations Family Service Center and find out what you can do for the families on base. (http://militarymarketing.militaryavenue.com/2009/05/how-to-get-involved-in-your-military.html)
75. Invite him over for a game on TV. Sit back and enjoy a beer together.
76. When cooking dinner, make enough for two families. Bring half to a military-family or invite their family over.
77. Benefit Of The Doubt. A little BOTD can go a long way to show your appreciation for the military-spouse.
78. Make an acrostic with his/her name filled with adjectives about their strengths. (TY, @MilAve_Deborah)
79. Flexibility is the name of game. Be flexible in making plans. Things happen out of her control.
80. When thanking a soldier for their service, thank their spouse, too! (TY, @Kdpartak)
81. Play a game of catch with her children. They may be missing the presence of a man in their life.
82. Businesses: Have a special gift for all the military spouses that come through your door; a key chain, a nail file, keep it simple.
83. Hit a mid-day movie together. Buy a large popcorn to share!
84. Invite her to a bible-study at your church. What a great way to meet new people!
85. Grab the strollers and take a walk together!
86. Servicemen - Buy her favorite lotion and give her a back rub.
87. Businesses - Having a special contest? Ask a military spouse to be a judge. She'll be honored.
88. Call, Send an email, leave a comment to her/him. Sometimes the smallest gesture means much more than you think. (TY, @proudwifey)
89. Service-member: Sign up for dance classes with your spouse.
90. Take time to get to know HER/HIM. He/she is more than a #milspouse (TY, @tiffsilverberg)
91. Do you have a friend you know she would enjoy knowing? Introduce them!
92. Do they have a green-thumb? Give a potted plant. "Bloom where you are planted" and a note that says thanks
93. Invite him over for a bbq on a Friday night!
94. Businesses: Do you see the flash of her ID when she makes a transaction? Be sure to say Thank you for her service!
95. Military Spouse in the family? Laminate a special card with the families' phone numbers, addresses, birthdays. Help her keep organized.
96. Service-Member: Take Leave on your anniversary. Do something special together. #milspouse (TY,@jen004)
97. Do you have a pool (or just a slip-n-slide!) invite the military-family over. Have a big pitcher of lemonade ready! (TY, @milave_col_k)
98. Plan a girls' day... manicures, pedicures and lunch!
99. Create a Themed box or basket for her. Drop it off at her door anonymously with a note of appreciation. (TY, @milave_deborah)
100. Businesses: Encourage your colleagues to offer a meaningful military-discount. Make yourself a town that appreciates the military!
101. Make her stop, breathe, and ASK "How can I help?" and then do it.
Wednesday, April 14, 2010
Can he just leave now?
I know this may sound bad to some, and those that are Army wives know what I am talking about. Since we got here August of 2009, we have known that there is a deployment ahead of us. In the last few weeks it has become more real. The dates of deployment are starting to show up, and it gets to be a lot. For a Wife that has never had to do this before, it is a lot to take in. My emotions are crazy all the time. When some one say something about the deployment, I get a little emotional. Emotional and scared to say the least.
At times I wish that he was already gone. Not because I do not love him, and want him to be here all the time, but because I think this is getting much harder knowing that he has to. I want him to be gone so that the good byes are all done already, and this feeling is gone. I would like at be counting down to his return rather than counting till he leaves. A year is along time, and I want it to be done with already. I know this is going to be so hard to watch him leave us.
Knowing that he is doing something so amazing, and for EVERYBODY in the US makes me a very proud person. Knowing that he is so un selfish with his time, and even his life is something to be proud of. I know that I am more than proud of him, and sometimes I think that the Army is a little selfish taking my husband for a whole 12 months. I do also know that this is his job, this is the life that we are to live from here on out.
My BIGGEST fear is that when he comes back, it won't really be my husband that comes back. There is to many things there that can change a person forever. I want the man that I married to come home and eveerything be great, but I am not counting on that to happen. My fear is that he sees something there that will change him forever. I will love him no matter what, and i will be there for him no matter what. What is ahead of us is going to be so tough for so long, and I know that if anyone has to be the rock, it has to be me. I just want this nightmare to be over with.
Some people will never have to know this feeling and at one point i thought that i envied them. Now i think more about it, and I do not envy people that will never know this feeling, because this right here is a show of strength and bravery for him, and his dedication for our country. Not only that but it s going to bring out better stronger people in both of us. I will become someone that has accomplished somehting some people never will or could. Our marraige will have stood up to some of the toughest things possible, and after all is said and done, we can say that we can do anything!!
At times I wish that he was already gone. Not because I do not love him, and want him to be here all the time, but because I think this is getting much harder knowing that he has to. I want him to be gone so that the good byes are all done already, and this feeling is gone. I would like at be counting down to his return rather than counting till he leaves. A year is along time, and I want it to be done with already. I know this is going to be so hard to watch him leave us.
Knowing that he is doing something so amazing, and for EVERYBODY in the US makes me a very proud person. Knowing that he is so un selfish with his time, and even his life is something to be proud of. I know that I am more than proud of him, and sometimes I think that the Army is a little selfish taking my husband for a whole 12 months. I do also know that this is his job, this is the life that we are to live from here on out.
My BIGGEST fear is that when he comes back, it won't really be my husband that comes back. There is to many things there that can change a person forever. I want the man that I married to come home and eveerything be great, but I am not counting on that to happen. My fear is that he sees something there that will change him forever. I will love him no matter what, and i will be there for him no matter what. What is ahead of us is going to be so tough for so long, and I know that if anyone has to be the rock, it has to be me. I just want this nightmare to be over with.
Some people will never have to know this feeling and at one point i thought that i envied them. Now i think more about it, and I do not envy people that will never know this feeling, because this right here is a show of strength and bravery for him, and his dedication for our country. Not only that but it s going to bring out better stronger people in both of us. I will become someone that has accomplished somehting some people never will or could. Our marraige will have stood up to some of the toughest things possible, and after all is said and done, we can say that we can do anything!!
Tuesday, April 6, 2010
To my Kids~~
Boys,
The day that you were born was the day that our life really began. The days that you two were born was the day that responsiblity became my middle name. It has tought me so much about myself, and the world around us. You boys make me smile when the whole world is cruel. Alhough sometimes you make the day harder, I am forever greatful to you both.
Dallas in almost three years you have taught me what it really means to be mommy. All the things that I can teach you, and that you can teach me. Both without even knowing it. As you are getting older and growing, I look at you and wonder where the time has gone. Where that little 5 pound 12 ounce baby has gone to. Just a few short years ago I could have lost you in the couch, and now you are as big as a 4 year old. You have completly skipped wearing 2T, and gotten to be a little man. I know that you are never going to stop growing no matter how many times I say I want you too. You learned to say I love you so long ago, and ever since than I have made you say it to me a thousand times a day. It still makes me smile every time.
Colton, you are learning so fast everyday. 8 months ago you were brought to me by a great blessing. Seems like yesterday I was waking up in the middle of the night to feed you every couple hours. Now your little hands are into everything. You have turned into a Daddy's boy :) You have taught me to do everything all over again, and twice :) Your wonderful, and I am so happy to wake up to you crying in the other room. Somtimes I complain about not sleeping in but that is the life that I choose having you two. I would not trade it for the world.
People like to ask me if I would have waited to have kids if I could go back. My answer changes everyday. The truth is, No i would not change a day of it. I maybe would have made better chioces for myslef before you guys got here, but after that my life has been a miracle everyday. You are as Much a teacher to me as I am to you. You two will always be my babies, and i love you both with my whole heart.
Everyday till untill you kids are older i will sing ' You are my Sunshine' everyday, read you 'I'll love you forever' and make you tell you love me as much as I can.
The day that you were born was the day that our life really began. The days that you two were born was the day that responsiblity became my middle name. It has tought me so much about myself, and the world around us. You boys make me smile when the whole world is cruel. Alhough sometimes you make the day harder, I am forever greatful to you both.
Dallas in almost three years you have taught me what it really means to be mommy. All the things that I can teach you, and that you can teach me. Both without even knowing it. As you are getting older and growing, I look at you and wonder where the time has gone. Where that little 5 pound 12 ounce baby has gone to. Just a few short years ago I could have lost you in the couch, and now you are as big as a 4 year old. You have completly skipped wearing 2T, and gotten to be a little man. I know that you are never going to stop growing no matter how many times I say I want you too. You learned to say I love you so long ago, and ever since than I have made you say it to me a thousand times a day. It still makes me smile every time.
Colton, you are learning so fast everyday. 8 months ago you were brought to me by a great blessing. Seems like yesterday I was waking up in the middle of the night to feed you every couple hours. Now your little hands are into everything. You have turned into a Daddy's boy :) You have taught me to do everything all over again, and twice :) Your wonderful, and I am so happy to wake up to you crying in the other room. Somtimes I complain about not sleeping in but that is the life that I choose having you two. I would not trade it for the world.
People like to ask me if I would have waited to have kids if I could go back. My answer changes everyday. The truth is, No i would not change a day of it. I maybe would have made better chioces for myslef before you guys got here, but after that my life has been a miracle everyday. You are as Much a teacher to me as I am to you. You two will always be my babies, and i love you both with my whole heart.
Everyday till untill you kids are older i will sing ' You are my Sunshine' everyday, read you 'I'll love you forever' and make you tell you love me as much as I can.
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