Memorial day

I fully understand the meaning of Memorial day. It's not really about those that are serving or have served. It is about those that made the ultimate sacrifice while serving their country. I have to say that this is one of many great holidays that I am so proud. I am proud to be an American, I am proud to be part of the land of the free, I am eternally grateful for those that lost it all to protect me and my kids.
I feel for the families that are now without. I know that I complain that my husband is gone right now. I often don't take into consideration those wives and kids that can't wait for a phone call, or can't anticipate a coming home. When I think about the future, I can't see it without Dave. I think about how our coming home will be and what we will do when he gets home. I dream of the feeling and sense of relief I will have. The ability to breathe again, and not have to worry all the time.
I think about things like what he and I will be doing in 5 years, and how our kids will be as they get older. I wonder how much it hurts the kids to not have daddy here for the next 8 months. I wonder what their little brains think about the whole situation. I wonder how they will react when they see him.
I forget that people have to give that up, all for the country. They have to continue to explain to their kids what happened to daddy. Little kids don't really know what kind of a hero their soldier was. all they know is they are not there and they don't know why. Knowing that I have to be without my husband for one year seems like nothing compared to those that thought the same thing, and then never got their loved one back.
I am not oblivious to the world around me. I fully understand that I could end up in this situation, but it's certainly not something that I want to think about. I don't like the thought, and it is kind of one of those things where you think "that's not going to happen to me." I guess not think that, but hope that it never happens.
Truth in the matter is, it doesn't matter how old you are, how smart you are, what color your skin is, married or single, fit, high ranking, low ranking, great marksmen, or the best of the best. Shit happens over there that people don't even want to know about. It happens to many many people all the time. It has been happening for a VERY long time. It will happen for a long time after today as well. It's a sad reality, and my heart hurts for all those lost.
They may be lost, but they are never forgotten. I pass the Post cemetery all the time on post, and each time it hits a place in my heart. I choke all the time that I am driving by. At the same time, I am proud. I don't look at a soldier here as a soldier, they are all heroes outside of their homes. It doesn't matter who they are or what they do in their free time, when duty calls, they are right there all the time to answer.
There are not many people that would sign up for something, knowing what the outcome might be. I mean think about it. I know that if someone said to me, well you can do this, but you might not ever make it back. I would walk away. I have a fear of death as most people do. It's not often something that you can control, or know the outcome of. The only thing these soldiers know, is this is what they want to do, and this is what they stand for no matter the future. That alone is a noble quest. It takes a lot of courage to do what they do.
So today as i go past the cemetery, I will stop, and take a moment. Not to mour those that have not made it back, but to give thanks. I will be grateful. For all those many men and woman that have lost it all for me and my country. When I see the flags on the graves, I know that I will be sad, and again feel for the families that are now left without, I will fear in the back of mind that this could be me someday. But there will be nothing more fulfilling than giving a few moments of my time to honor those resting in peace there.
For this point forward, I plan to stop there more than just on memorial day. These wonderful people should be honored and appreciated more than one time a year. SO I will now stop as often as possible and I hope that others start to do the same. TO make sure those that those that are gone are really never forgotten. You don't have to be close to a soldier to realize what they have done, and what they have lost. I mean in reality, they did it for you.